Happy Easter!

I woke up late and was very lazy on Easter morning. For example, it was after 10:00 a.m. when I finally made breakfast!

I fried two slices of ham and then two eggs over easy. A cup of coffee and some toast and I was in hog heaven!

[pun intended]

I finally got off my lazy *ss and shaved and showered.

Then I went out back.

Sidebar: It was so nice to walk out the back door for a change. I've been going around the front for weeks now!

But, on a side note, my right arm hurts. Probably from picking up the 15-pane glass window. But I am proud of myself for not resorting to the opiates I got at the hospital. I freakin' rock!!!

Sidebar: The super glue has all worn off. I'm left with a three inch ugly weal of a scar. I am still taking suggestions for a tattoo to cover this!

Note to Jake: Popeye's spinach can will not cover this! I'm thinking maybe a 3-D butterfly.

Okay, so it looks better on her. I get that...


Anyway, I got the hose box out of the shed and hooked it up. I took the winter lid off the reflecting pool and put the hose in it. I turned the water on and filled it up.

I went back inside and got out the young Shaolin monk. I put him in his meditation place, next to the pool.

I refilled the feeders. There was a very brave, young squirrel who refused to leave (he probably had rabies) so I amused myself (and him) by tossing him a peanut every now and then.

I got out the window box and hung it up. Unfortunately, I didn't have any magic dirt to fill it up. Then I took all the patio furniture out of the shed and set it up as well. It's Spring, baby!!!

Note: It was sunny and 61 degrees here. I was mentally kicking myself in the ass for not going with my first Easter dinner idea, grilling a couple of lamb chops.

But, the damn weatherman said it was going to rain this afternoon, so I got the stupid Honeybaked ham.

Then I got the pruning shears and trimmed the Japanese maple.

I picked up a lot of fallen branches and chucked them over the fence. Which was stupid, I know. Because I already signed up with Jon Boy Landscaping for a winter yard cleanup and new mulch on all the beds. (I'm getting too old for that shit). I just don't like seeing them out there!

Reminder: Grumpy old man (Vicky's label, not mine) in his underwear, yelling, "Get off my lawn!"

I came back inside after locking up the shed.

I had a wonderful Easter dinner planned and bought. I was going to start with  broccoli and cheese soup, followed by broiled asparagus with Parmesan cheese, some ham slices, warmed and potatoes au gratin.

Instead, I took a nap.

I woke up from thunder after 8:00 p.m. I checked and it was raining like hell.

I thought about Easter dinner and then said, "Fnck it!" I made a ham sandwich with deli mustard, the last of the chips and a pickle. Certainly not the Easter dinner I had planned, but it was good!

I watched "Jaws" for the umpteenth time and then went to bed.